Mattel's Greatest(Most Infamous) Scam of 1999-The PATRIOT manufactured BARBIE & HOT WHEELS Computers

In 1999, 

MATTEL suffered one of their most crappiest fiscal years of all time.....

Sorry for the anachronistic photo but

This is the closest I could find of an EXECUTIVE having a migraine over things

not going their way.

NO!!!

Y2K hysteria was not responsible for biting them CEO's asses.

But rather it was the ill-advised decisions from them CEOS of late 90s MATTEL.

Things like the ill-fated AQUISITION of THE LEARNING COMPANY was amongst one of those things.

But the worst was yet to come:

Gentlemen, These are the infamous PATRIOT Manufactured 

HOT WHEELS & BARBIE PCs of 1999.

These machines cost around $600 USD.

And that was 1999 Dollars.

(Adjusted for inflation, these could cost around $1,204.31 USD in 2026 dollars.)

Windows PCs costing under $1000 USD is nothing new as many attempts were made many years ago and beyond to try to get the cost down that magic number of A GRAND.

But PATRIOT COMPUTERS took a very weird approach.

They just licensed an EXISTING DESIGN who's FLEXATX board design made these computers possible.

And cheapened out on things.

For one, the CPU was a MENDOCINO Intel CELERON clocked at around 500mMHz or lower,

They often came with 64MB of PC100 Ram though some came with 128MB,

Hard Drive Space can vary but 10GB seemed to be the standard for 1999-2000.

Windows 98SE was the choice because Win9X & Reliability.

The idea was to give a child their own Computer because MATTEL figured the parents would want to keep them children away from the FAMILY's PC or from the PARENT's Work PC.

Yeah, ARTHUR THE WRECKER, the 1997 episode based on the AMERICAN BOOKS by MARC BROWN made by the very CANADIAN CINAR Production company.........

Yes, I used that as an analogy of PARENTS wanting their kids off the WORK PCs.

Whether it's the DAUGHTER who's into dolls

Or the Son who's into Cars

and VICE VERSA,

The choice of either HOT WHEELS or BARBIE was to give a choice depending on the child's gender or their choice of likes and preferences.

And all of it at a low low price of less than $1000 USD.

And the price was just right for the parents to give their children.

As usual with the most PRE-BUILT Computers of the mid to late 90s,

These Computers were often bundled with peripherals and Software to make using these Computers more interesting.

The Hot Wheels PC

It's bundle came with GUY FIERI style flame jobs not just on the case but also on the ALTEC LANSING Speakers, Monitor, Keyboard, Mouse, Mouse Pad, CD Carrying Case, etc.

It also came with a USB Steering Wheel to play your racing games even though the bundle has mostly HOT WHEELS STUNT TRACK DRIVERs 1 & 2 alongside some edutainment titles as well as KIDPIX.

The BARBIE PC on the other hand, is a different story.

Unlike the Hot Wheels PC, the BARBIE PC does away with the blue combined with the GUY FIERRI flames and instead has a rather bland Chrome Grey Painted Accents combined with a Pink Handle and Pink Flowers.

And Considering the demographic, the Steering Wheel is replaced with a DIGITAL CAMERA which is as cheap as thos.......

It's actually cheaper than those VTECH TOY DIGITAL CAMERAS I see at Best Buy!!!!

anyway,

The BARBIE PHOTO DESIGNER DIGITAL CAMERA

Was included with the BARBIE PC alongside it's aforementioned software bundle.

Did I mention how CHEAP it was?

It's similar to the NICK CLICK DIGITAL CAMERA also released that year.....

Remember that too?

HOLY CRAP!!!!! THEY COULD JUST BE THE SAME PRODUCT!!!!!

Just with different Market Brandings.

Though I did read that the BARBIE CAMERA was more successful as that came out in 1998..... while the NICK CLICK languished..... 

Truly, those Computer and Software Bundles would have made both the HOT WHEELS & BARBIE PCs the top seller to end 1999 on a High Note.....

But there was a problem....

The aforementioned Specs were rather UNDERWHELMING.

If your PATRIOT PC had 333MHZ, that might not be good for your child who'd want to play a 3D Title since the PATRIOT PCs had to rely on their less than stellar BP810 Chipsets for Graphics and because these BP810 FLEXATX motherboards do not have PCI or AGP slots for expansion, upgrading the graphics was a no-go.

And Considering that the HOT WHEELS PC came with a USB Steering Wheel and had some RACING GAMES to go along with that, that might not have been a smart idea......

DOUBLY SO IF YOU WERE A YOUNGER SIBLING WANTING TO PLAY YOUR OLDER SIBLING'S COPY OF NEED FOR SPEED TITLES.........

The other problem was the design of the computers themself.

Tacky GUY FIERI flames and EXHIBIT NUMBER aside,

The MATTEL PATRIOT Computers used a variant of INTEL's BP810 FLEXATX motherboard as to make fitting it in the very small case more palpable.

But because of the interior of the case, it's very cramped to work on....

So PATRIOT made the smart decision to made the MOTHERBOARD TRAY modular as to make self-servicing much easier.

And that's not the END-ALL-BE-ALL of why these PATRIOT Computers were so bad.

The culprit is the rather CHEAP Flex-ATX......

more like a CRAPPY EARLY VARIANT of an SFX Power Supply.

Had terrible CAPACITORS which were the cause of the high failure rate of the HOT WHEELS & BARBIE PCs.

Fortunately, Replacing these PSUs are a cinch but because of how cramped these Computers are, you might have to settle for a modern SFX MODULAR PSU.

The thing about these MATTEL COMPUTERS that makes me want to PUKE, is this:

Take a close look at that label there.

Why on EARTH would MATTEL want to outsource Computer Manufacturing to my Home Country in 1999 just to manufacture these Computers?

I'm guessing it's because MATTEL was in a financial pickle 

(this was after their infamous acquisition of THE LEARNING COMPANY in 1999 after all.)

But, in a similar problem to the HYPERION Computer from 1983, Another Canadian Manufactured Computer from an American Company in HUNTSVILLE, ALABAMA,

The Hot Wheels and Barbie PCs had a laundry list of FAILURES, FAR WORSE than what the Hyperion suffered from.

Now don't get me wrong. 

I'm not against AMERICAN COMPUTER COMPANIES outsourcing to CANADA just to save several thousands of dollars.

They've done some wonderful collaborations.

For example, 

BILLY COORE's Second most favorite PACKARD BELL, THE CORNER COMPUTER

One reason he loves this particular PACKARD BELL as his second best compared to his childhood 822CDT, is the fact that it's a CANADIAN MANUFACTURED Model so for a guy living in WESTERN NORTH CAROLINA, to him, that makes it all the more unique.

But the HOT WHEELS & BARBIE PCs were definitely not of quality...

THEY'RE SHITE!!! Through and Through.....

Even the very CANADIAN MDG, though admittingly, they cheap out on motherboard mounting with less screws then usual,

They don't even manufacture their computers in CANADA..... sort of.

MDG does manufacture their Computers in CANADA but they source their components like Motherboards, Power Supplies, Cases, Graphics Cards, etc. from ASIAN Countries like TAIWAN because of the PC's off-the-shelf approach made possible by IBM circa 1981.

And it gets worse,

The High Failure Rates of the PATRIOT COMPUTERS were so bad, that the return rates were also high as well.

This led to the bankruptcy of PATRIOT because of the overload of trying to address the issues while MATTEL did nothing to help.

And what's the biggest scam?

Well... it was MATTEL having the gall to placate the unfulfilled orders with FREE GIFT PACKAGES containing a $100 Toy and a gift certificate voucher.

Whatever.

MATTEL reaped the dollars,

And PATRIOT COMPUTERS went Bankrupt due to the Crappy Manufacturing.

And them parents revolted due to all that money they spent now being lost to a company that did nothing to help solve the issue about why the HOT WHEELS & BARBIE PCs suffered PSU Failure.

Why am I going on a PETER FRAMPTON style rant about Mattel?

Well, this is why:

Or at least that's what I thought.....

I saw a listing on FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE but for some reason, I didn't take a screenshot with my iPhone 17 Pro Max, nor did I save the listing on my Facebook Account..... so......

At least this WINDOWS 11 Print Screen screenshot will have to do:

Man, that seller must have had a hell of a lot of work replacing the old CRAPPY POWER SUPPLY & the CPU Cooler before putting it up on FACEBOOK MARKETPLACE.

To give you an idea how maddening it was to even repair these machines, here's an old LGR video from 2016 where CLINT BASINGER tried to restore the BARBIE COMPUTER:

Spoiler Alert: HE SUCCEEDS!!! 

His reactions, frustrations, and later SIGHS OF RELIEF after the grueling repair work are all genuine reactions.

But I'm glad I had my COMPAQ PRESARIO

& VOBIS HIGHSCREEN during the transition to the new Millennium...

I can't imagine how pissed both my mom and dad would have been if they purchased these computers from MATTEL, only for the power supply to crap out on me....

Similar to how I'm glad I never asked my mother to buy an XBOX 360 for me during it's shelf-life, only for it to RED RING on me.

The less amount of money spent on CRAPPY HARDWARE due to rushed soldering chipsets or cheapened out manufacturing on components, 

THE BETTER.

And I haven't checked his blog yet but I have a hunch that I I beat DAVID FARQUHAR on discussing the Controversy of the MATTEL PATRIOT Computers.....

REALLY! NO LIE!

I checked his Blog, ran some searches but came up empty so I feel proud to have discussed to you my fine readers about MATTEL's biggest fumbles at the turn of the millennium.

And as usual, thank you very much for reading and keep an eye out for more tantalizing blogposts....

Starting with this SNEAK PEAK:

I'm very hard at work with this one but I swear, it's gonna be an exciting post about a Mickey Mouse short that I've actually watched many years ago on my MDG HORIZON Windows XP PC back in the day.

William Shatner..... wants you..... to buy..... the..... COMMODORE VIC 20-The 1981 Commercials for the COMMODORE VIC 20+How did the machine come to be?

Back in the early 1980s, 

Canadian Actor WILLIAM SHATNER,

aka CAPTAIN KIRK from STAR TREK, The Original Series(1966-1969)

Starred in commercials for a certain little home computer from COMMODORE BUSINESS MACHINES in WEST CHESTER, PENNSYLVANIA:

Ah yes, that COMMODORE VIC20. Pictured above is the early PET KEYBOARD revision from 1981.

Meant to be a successor to the earlier PET Computer released by Commodore back in 1977

The VIC20 however was susposed to be more advanced than what COMMODORE was initially planning.

I've read that the Successor to the PET was susposed to be the TOI

Notice the pun there?

Unfortunately, the TOI never materialized due to a manufacturing and Cost Issue.

Remember, RAM prices in the 1980s were very expensive, so don't rant about wanting to PUNCH SAM ALTMAN in the face at a shareholders meeting.... YET....

Because RAM PRICING was even worse back in the 80s due to how new the PERSONAL COMPUTER market was back then.

So what prevented the TOI from being COST-EFFECTIVE?

Well it was the result of issues relating to RAM..... in a connected sense.

The late CHUCK PEDDLE wanted this machine to be an 80-Column machine

Just to compete with the APPLE II Plus in the wake of the success of both LOTUS-123 and VISICALC.

However, the 80-Columns display tech required the MOS 6564 Chip but that required STATIC RAM which at the time was HYPER-EXPENSIVE and using the cheaper DYNAMIC RAM was a no-go due to the constant refresh issues.

Frustrated with the TOI project going nowhere due to the STUPID HIGH PRICE OF SRAM, JACK TRAMIEL noticed a little project that fellow employee ROBERT YANNES was making which was a Custom-Built computer he dubbed THE MicroPET. When TRAMIEL saw the MicroPET, he immediately decided to greenlight that hobby project and ordered it to be MASS-PRODUCED just in time for CES 1980.

What COMMODORE SHATNER COMMERCIAL you ask?

Well, here's said commercial below:

And not one but two of them.

The above one was just SHATNER shilling for COMMODORE, praising everything relating to how simple of a computer it was but also that it can play great games.

Speaking about VIDEO GAMES,

Here's a much more interesting Commercial below:

If you can't settle on what's better, ATARI or INTELLEVISION,

then back in 1981, you could just follow CAPTAIN KIRK's advice and say;

"GET A COMMODORE VIC20!!!! IT'S BETTER!!!!"

You can use the computer to do your Business crap, program your software, or even play video games on it.

Of course, that mantra wouldn't last long due to what's to come in 1982:

Yup. Good old, COMMODORE 64.

The only thing the C64 and the VIC 20 have in common is that they share the same peripherals to a point you can use the same tape drives, same 1541 Floppy Drives, printers, etc.

Nowadays, what with the controversies with the way both PLAYSTATION & XBOX are now being handled now, I'd probably say:

"Just build an AMD RYZEN GAMING PC with WINDOWS 11 PRO or STEAMOS 3.8! It's better."

Just as long as you ignore your WALLET's complaints or find better deals for things like RAM at Select WALMARTs or SEAGATE FIRECUDAs at a reasonable price before they get sold out... etc.

Notice I did not say PC MASTER RACE?

I just don't want to make BEN CROSHAW angry at me or at you wonderful readers of mine.

I just wanted to make this post because 2026 is the 45th Anniversary of the COMMODORE VIC20 in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA......

It's also the 45th Anniversary of the modern x86 PC Architecture as well but that will have to wait until next month.

Clash of coined terms who's punchlines backfired and were rewritten to mean something else-Cal Arts Style vs. PC Master Race

There are at times where people coin terms for things and yet, years later, they become rewritten to totally mean something else rather than what that term was originally susposed to mean.

First off is

CALARTS STYLE.

This is a term to describe the MODERN AMERICAN ANIMATION aesthetic that we see nowadays.

But the term CALARTS Style didn't mean what it is today.

The term was originally coined by retired Canadian Animator JOHN K. in a long since deleted blogpost where when he was describing Brad Bird's THE IRON GIANT(1999)

He ruthlessly criticized the both the AMERICAN & CANADIAN side of ANIMATION for always drawing their characters in the Classic DISNEY MOLD instead of coming up with new animation styles to suit the artist's needs.

And really, who can blame him,

(We're still mad at his allegations and his rage towards his late father MICHAEL)

If you look at films from Disney's competitors from back in the day like.....

The Princess and the Goblin(1991)

Ferngully: The last rainforest(1992)

The PageMaster(1994)

Once Upon a Forest(1993)

The Thief and the Cobbler(1992 Workprint and Recobbled Cut)

Cats don't dance(1997)

Quest for Camelot(1998)

Almost all of these productions required the film to go through the realms of designing their characters in the DISNEY mold because executives are obsessed with the money as well as unseating DISNEY and making a fool out of MICHAEL EISNER...

Too bad their mantra caused these films to bomb in the BOX OFFICE.

Only a few OUTRIGHT defied the mantra such as....

BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD DO AMERICA(1996)

This eventually moved into the realm of ALL-CGI movies where once again, the EXECUTIVES demand that the characters be in the..... PIXAR mold...

NO IFS, ANDS, OR BUTS

So this meant films that had really great concept art

 They're older art gets tossed out the window and replaced with piece of shit imitations of what's hot 

Somewhere along the line in 2010, 

ADVENTURE TIME showed up on CARTOON NETWORK after NICKELODEON rejected the show.

And then suddenly, many an artist in the US and CANADA decided to bank in on what made ADVENTURE TIME so successful and they deduced it was the art style.

STAR VS. THE FORCES OF EVIL

RICK & MORTY

And certain legacy characters like THE FREAK BROTHERS are redesigned to use this new art style whether the original creator likes it or not.

THE FREAK BROTHERS 

as originally illustrated by GILBERT SHELTON

THE FREAK BROTHERS

as they appear in the TUBI Series.

I, like a lot of you people who are against this mantra of the modern animation aesthetic, thought that the infamous CALARTS design was enforced by EXECUTIVES.....

But the reality is that the art style is actually enforced by the Alumni not just from CALARTS but also from the likes of those from SCHOOL OF VISUAL ARTS in New York.

and some from SHERIDAN COLLEGE in Canada, have also followed suit.

Now, let's switch gears and go to the gaming side which is PC MASTER RACE

Just like with CALARTS STYLE where it was JOHN K. criticizing North American artists for following DISNEY, only for it to devolve into a criticism of BEAN MOUTH DESIGNS,

PC MASTER RACE originally started as a criticism of a Factor of Gamers who think COMPUTERS are King,

only for the term to be far removed from the original intent.

BEN CROSHAW of ZERO PUNCTUATION fame,

originally coined the term PC MASTER RACE in a 2008 online article he wrote for THE ESCAPIST where he criticized the ELITIST attitudes he perceived amongst PC GAMERs regarding the player base for the WINDOWS port of THE WITCHER.

Here are his words from said article:

What quickly becomes obvious is that THE WITCHER is very much a PC-exclusive game, which are typically designed to be as complex and unintuitive as possible so that those dirty console-playing peasants don't ruin it for the glorious PC-gaming master race.

-Ben Croshaw

So in his words, it was poking fun at those PC GAMING ELITISTS out there.

Unfortunately for CROSHAW, the term wound up being misconstrued by REDDITORS across WEB2.0 and later WEB3

and the term quickly became a symbol of PRIDE for them same PC GAMING ELITISTS and their SUPERIORITY of their COMPUTERS over GAME CONSOLES.

Using Dr. Livesy, Jim Hawkins, & Squire Trelawny from

 the UKRAINIAN TREASURE ISLAND(1988) 

to represent "CHADLY" PC GAMERS.

Why?

Because....

01. PC ports of games can be modded with different assets,

FAMILY GUY mod for GTA V Legacy on PC

(GTA V Enhanced doesn't support the above mods..... yet.)

02. You can change the graphics settings on the fly to suit your rigs needs,

Using CYBERPUNK 2077 as an example

03. The hardware is user upgradeable due to IBM taking the OFF-THE-SHELF approach back in 1981 when releasing the 5150 PC that year,

PC depicted is the original 5150 PC from 1981.

04. You can use any game controller as long as it conforms to USB and Bluetooth,

This needs no description as it's perfectly described above....

05. You can emulate other hardware though most emulation efforts are limited to older consoles like a SEGA GENESIS or Sony PS2 just to name a few.

KEGA FUSION playing EARTHWORM JIM

PCSX2 playing SHADOW OF THE COLLOSUS    

It's clear many years later that BEN CROWSHAW now regrets coining the term because the term was to criticize a mentality, only for it to be context to mean the opposite in the ensuing years and that not only drove him insane but also made him want to RAGE against the factor of people who support the idiom now.

For example, when he was questioned about it the PC GAMING community during the release of KINGDOM COME: DELIVERANCE in 2018,

He blurted out a profane response to his dislike of the PCMR Community and their arrogance.

I'm not going to use his words regarding PCMR so....

Instead, I'll quote from CROSHAW about his regrets:

"It was intended to be ironic, to illustrate what I perceived at the time to be an elitist attitude among a certain kind of PC gamer. People who invest in expensive gaming PCs and continually spend money to make sure the tech in their brightly-lit tower cases is up to date. Who actually prefer games that are temperamental to get running and that have complicated keyboard interfaces, just because it discourages new or 'casual' players who will in some way taint the entire community with their presence. I meant it as a dig."

Nothing short of the 

2008 Great Recession,

2020-2023 COVID Semiconductor Shortage,

and now the 

2025-2028 RAM Shortage/AI Price Hikes for Consumer Ram and flash storage.....

Is enough to put an end to the PC MASTER RACE idiom just to finally give CROSHAW some closure without driving him up the drywall....

And I just noticed something in that above quote from BEN CROSHAW:

Who actually prefer games that are temperamental to get running.

TEMPERMENTAL, huh?

I've been there.

My very first PROPER PC game INCOMING,

I remember how temperamental that game was getting to run on my family's PCs back in the day indeed but it was COMPAQ's fault for bundling it with my PRESARIO 5477

thinking it could run on INTEL's integrated AGP chipset but in reality, you needed a 3DFX Voodoo 3 AGP GPU to run that thing with the best framerates.

Instead, I got a game that either refused to run, or it ran like PIGCRAP with a pitch-black sky which made me wait 25 years until I got paid for a version on STEAM that works in MODERN WINDOWS.

Oh well, it pays to make you ponder about your childhood wish fulfillments and whatnot.